Ebeneezer
Come on kids.  Welcome to Monster Street!

(As the kids enter the crypt, the graveyard wall pulls back to reveal Monster Street which lights up with streetlamps, pumpkins, and Hallowe’en lights. Screams and spooky sounds are heard.   Unseen to the audience, Dracula’s three Brides lurk in the shadows of the crypt, greeting the kids as they come through.   Eventually, they emerge on the far side of the crypt and Dracula holds the Invisible Man’s clothes!)

Dracula
Look at this!  The Invisible Man undressed in my crypt! That really creeps me out!   Now he could be anywhere!

Ebeneezer
That’s pretty weird.   So, you got some candy for the kids or what?

Dracula
Ah yes, I hid it in this tree.   (He reaches over a fence.)   Right behind this floating knife here.    Aaah!   I didn’t leave a floating knife here. (He pats an invisible body.)   Oh, it’s not floating.  It’s just sticking out of the body of a dead invisible guy.    Aaah! (He looks at the clothing in his hands.) It’s the Invisible Man!    Someone has done him in!

Ebeneezer
Are you sure he’s dead?

Dracula
(Pulling the knife from the body.)   Here.   Hold this.

Ebeneezer
(Taking the knife, blade first.) Yuck!   Invisible blood!

(Dracula rolls the body over and puts his ear to it’s chest.)

Dracula
He’s dead.

Ebeneezer
But who would have killed him on Monster Street!   That’s unthinkable!   It’s unbelieva-

Dracula
Actually we’re all monsters so it could have been anyone.

Ebeneezer
Would monsters kill monsters?  Isn’t that against the Monster code?

Dracula
Nah, no such thing.

Ebeneezer
This truly DOES call for a song.

Dracula
Oh no!

Trick or Treating on Monster Street – 2003

Ebeneezer
When you all walked through Dracula’s house on the night of Hallowe’en,
You walked right into another dimension.
It’s a monster world where all the folks are monsters, big and mean!
Although they usually have good intentions.
So Monster Street’s a pretty awesome place to trick-or-treat
And most of them will give you something awfully good to eat.
But tonight there’s been a murder so not everything’s the same.
And if we pay attention, we might find out who’s to blame.
So, let’s go about our business trick-or-treating, me and you.
We’ll get our treats and maybe catch a murderer too!
There’s been a murder on Monster Street,
Monster Street, Monster Street.
But Trick-or-treating on Monster Street,
Together we will go!

(Spoken) So, Dracula, what monster would have killed another monster?

Dracula
Who said it was a monster? He was last seen with Dr. Frankenstein, a human being!   And I don’t know if I’d really call The Invisible Man a monster.   REAL monsters don’t have to take potions to become monsters!   Anyway, I’m really late so…

Ebeneezer
But what if this isn’t the end of it?  What if someone’s coming after all the famous monsters?    A silver bullet for Wolfman?   A stake for you?

Dracula
You’ve got a point.    We need a clue.   (They glance at the “body”.) A visible clue.

Ebeneezer
What about his clothing?   Maybe there’s a clue there.

Dracula
Nothing but this little book in his pocket.  (He opens it.) Great Samhain!   He was planning to blackmail me!

Ebeneezer
Let me see that.   You don’t want people thinking you’re hiding evidence, do you?

Dracula
Take it. (Scurge does.)   He was blackmailing everyone.

Ebeneezer
Look at that!  You’re not kidding!  All the famous monsters on Monster Street.   That gives all of you a pretty good motive for killing him!

Dracula
Oh, please.  What was this big secret he was going to blackmail me with anyway?

Ebeneezer
It says here that “Dracula was once – a human being!   His name was Vlad Dracula, Prince of Walachia and also known as Vlad the Impaler.”

Dracula
Is that it?  Now, it’s MY turn for a song!

Dracula’s Song

Intro

Dracula
Vampires start out human.  Everyone knows that.
They’re human ‘til they’re bitten by a vampire. (Beat) Or a bat.
It’s true that I was famous. In fact, I was regaled.
Yes, EVERYBODY talked of me! (Shrug) The ones who weren’t impaled.

Verse One

In a little part of Romania,
Just south of Transylvania,
There’s a place they call Walachia
Where, by chance, they made me king.   (Alright, Prince.)

And to keep the Turkish forces out,
Or if someone’s loyalty was in doubt,
Or if I was feeling down and out,
Well, impalement was my thing.

(Dracula’s Brides slink out of the crypt and form a back-up chorus behind Dracula.)

Bridge One

Dracula’s Brides
People said he was the worst!  He
Always was a bit blood thirsty!

Chorus One

Dracula
My name was Vlad.

Brides
His father named him Vlad.

Dracula
And I was bad!

Brides
Yes, he was Oh so bad!

Dracula
And this was long before I had my fangs!
I’d run a spear…

Brides
A nasty wooden spear.

Dracula
From there to here!

Brides
It caused a lot of fear!

Dracula
And I never felt the slightest guilty pangs!

Verse Two

Now, I needed to scare off the Turks,
And I found impalement really works.
They saw what I’d done and ran, those jerks.
Twenty thousand did the trick.

But eventually they cut me down.
Tried to plant my body in the ground
But, as you can see, I’m still around!
Although, now I fear sharp sticks!

Bridge Two

Brides
Dracula means “Son of the Dragon!”

Dracula
Or “Son of the Devil” but I ain’t braggin’!

Chorus Two

My name was Vlad!

Brides
His royal name was Vlad!

Dracula
And I was bad!

Brides
He made folks good and mad!

Dracula
They killed the man who once possessed that name.
But I came back!

Brides
His evil soul came back!

Dracula
Now, call me Drac!

Brides
Ula! Don’t call him Drac!

Dracula
And as a vampire earned my greatest fame!

Bridge Three

I’m proud of who I used to be!

Brides
You’ve got the wrong man, obviously!

Chorus Three

Dracula
You want some sweets?

Brides
It’s candy he won’t eat!

Dracula
Say Trick or Treat!

Brides
Just move your little feet.

Dracula
I’m just a vampire.  I’m not really mean!
Now, I won’t bite!

Brides
Unless your blood type’s right!

Dracula
Well, not tonight!

Brides
Tonight he’ll be polite!

Dracula
So have a bite on me for Hallowe’en!

Dracula and Brides
Yes, have a bite on me (him) for Hallowe’en!

Dracula
(Spoken) Ladies and Gentlemen, my brides.   Aren’t they lovely?   Now, let’s hear the magic words.   Here you go, kiddies.   Have a kiss from Dracula!   Relax.   A Hershey’s kiss.  And I didn’t even impale them with little toothpicks!

Ebeneezer
You’re pretty convincing, Dracula.   But you’re still a suspect until we’ve talked to everyone in this little book.

Dracula
The next name on your list is Larry Talbot!  THAT should be interesting!

Bride One
You don’t have to go, Ebeneezer.

Bride Two
There’s no hurry.

Bride Three
Yes, join us for a bite!

Ebeneezer
I have a feeling that I wouldn’t be the one doing the biting.  No thank you, ladies.  Kids?

(Sings) There’s been a murder on Monster Street,
Monster Street, Monster Street.
But Trick-or-Treating on Monster Street,
To the Wolfman’s House we’ll go!

(They move forward to the next house, which is pretty trashed and covered with claw marks, and Ebeneezer knocks on the door.)

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